The Frank Morgan Foundation

The Frank Morgan Foundation is an informal institution with formal tendencies. We convene at the intersection of metaphysics and single malt—where meaning is debated, then quietly decanted.

• I. On the Nature of the Real:
  We treat certainty as a temporary condition—useful, but never to be trusted.
• II. On Proper Proof:
  Arguments must be coherent; whisky must be honest. Both may be cask strength.
• III. On the Ethics of Oak:
  We respect time, wood, and silence. We do not rush maturation, conclusions, or guests.
• IV. On Peat & Paradox:
  Contradictions are permitted, provided they are well-balanced and lightly smoked.
• V. On Unnecessary Formality:
  Ritual is encouraged. Excessive seriousness is discouraged. Both shall be conducted politely.
• VI. On Archival Conduct:
  Records may be incomplete. This is intentional. Interpretations must remain generous.
• VII. On Membership:
  Entrance is voluntary. Compliance is inevitable (in the nicest possible way).

Selected entries from the Foundation’s catalog. Each file is authentic in tone, if not in chronology.

• FILE 01 — The Doctrine of the Last Pour: A memorandum on endings, refusals, and why the final dram tastes like resolution.
• FILE 02 — The Angel’s Share as a Legal Entity: Draft bylaws granting evaporation limited voting rights.
• FILE 03 — Notes on Silence: Field observation: the best arguments occur after the second sip, not during the first.
• FILE 04 — Peat as a Metaphysical Medium: Preliminary report: smoke carries questions farther than answers.
• FILE 05 — On the Proper Naming of the Unnameable: Recommendation to use distillery codes and let the universe do the rest.

Tasting notes are philosophical documents disguised as refreshments. Labels may be intentionally vague.

All messages are routed through a ceremonial relay to Headquarters. Replies, when they occur, are delivered according to the Foundation’s internal calendar (a non-linear instrument).